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Last Updated: Jul 16, 2008 - 3:12:20 PM |
The family is going to the zoo today. This much-anticipated event has been planned for a few weeks, and the excitement coming from your two-year-old is palpable. “The zoo, the zoo,” he shouts, jumping up and down. “See George, go see George.” The George he is referring to would be Curious George. You have recently been forced to watch the “George Visits the Zoo” episode around 157 times since deciding that the weekend plans would in fact involve visiting an actual zoo. So, as said before, everyone is excited, so you hop in the mini-van and head toward the Richmond Metro Zoo. Really, Richmond Metro? As we are driving, it becomes quite clear that this zoo is neither in Richmond nor in a metropolitan area. It’s quite confusing, but no matter; you and yours are on the way.
As per your usual luck, you are one of the first to arrive at the zoo. As you walk up to the pay booth, you can’t help but wonder if you could possibly pass your child off as “under two,” because then he would be free. As you take a better look, you realize that this would probably be impossible; he’s huge, and looks like a three-year-old to most. Oh well, add another $7.25 to the $50 you have already spent in admission for the husband and yourself and for the gas to drive out there. No way are you spending $2 for a cup of food for the animals, either. Good trick to remember: always stand next to people with the animal food; it’s cost-effective and your child is not deprived of giraffe slobber.
As your child is shouting to go see the giraffes, you look around and can’t help but feel a little depressed for these poor animals. That said, you do appreciate the exotic animals, and the look on your child’s face helps ease the guilt a little bit. However, your child becomes scared of the gentle-eyed giraffes and begins screaming so loud everyone turns to stare at you, including mama giraffe (yes, even animal mothers can be judgmental with their eyes). You quickly move on to the orangutans. At this point, you see something so ridiculous you want to scream, as your two-year-old was minutes before. There are adults, with their children, throwing food at this poor primate. Yes, throwing food at him. Orangutans are intelligent beings, and it looks so defeated sitting there trying to catch the stuff people are throwing at him. At this point you can take no more; it’s time to go.
Last but not least on the grand adventure of the zoo, is of course, the gift shop. The gift shop is every parent’s worst nightmare, yet we continue to punish ourselves by taking our children into their sneaky, overpriced lairs. Of course, we emerge with a stuffed baby giraffe and a bag of horribly expensive plastic safari animals, but hey, what can you do, actually tell them no? Not at this point. We have made it through with only one incident of embarrassing screaming; you are not testing him now when you are so close to freedom.
All in all, it was a good day, filled with love, excitement, screaming fits, guilt, and anxiousness – a typical mother’s Saturday.
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